It's Your Body, Your Mind, Your Choice - Don't try to make it MINE!!

Famous Bollywood actress Deepika Padukone’s “My Body My Choice” video that has gone viral these days has provoked my hibernated mind to think. This video was released jointly by Deepika and director Homi Adajania in association with Vogue India as part of their campaign on women's empowerment. But I feel that the word “Women Empowerment” has lost its real meaning amidst all the political and media attention these days. Best example is this video

The video starts with Deepika saying “My Body, My Mind , My Choice”. This is not something that only women aspire for. Equal percentage of men also face situations questioning their decisions and even they feel like screaming out – It’s My Life, My Choice. This is a problem that the youth of India is facing – Youth of Both Genders. So how is it that we are representing injustice to only women in this tagline?

“It’s My Choice to Marry or Not to Marry.” – To marry or not to marry is a problem that not only girls but also guys face. I have equal number of friends who are boys forced into marriage as are girls. I do agree that choices on “whom to marry” given to guys are more liberal than girls, but the choice “Not to Marry” is not given even to guys in our society.

“To have Sex before marriage or outside the marriage, to not have sex, is my choice” - What kind of women empowerment promotion is this? I do understand that the last phrase “to not have sex” is a choice that's least granted to married women. I have heard from quite a few married friends that its almost impossible to deny sex to their husbands when they don't feel like it. But cheating or adultery is not something one preaches to anyone. There is a thin line between exercising ones freedom and trespassing someone else's. I don't say that people don't cheat on their spouses, but one does not advocate it as a right thing to do. This is like saying, To Rape or not, To Kill or not, is my choice.

I remember, during one of the sports drill back in school, while practicing for March-past; our sports trainer had told - While Marching, swing your arms and legs, with such discipline such that you don’t hit your neighboring cadet. It depicts your freedom. You are free to do what you like as long as you are not disturbing people near you. I am not advocating the societal standards, if you have read my past posts; you would by now know that I will be the last person to say – Follow the Societies standards blindly. What I meant was, we don’t have the right to ruin someones life by our acts and cover it up saying It’s my choice.

Nevertheless, this video is everything but women empowerment. Right to choice of clothes, marriage, music, sex applies to both men and women. Take a break Miss Deepika Padukone. Sit back, relax and think. Try to gather some common sense. And please, don't use your fame to create such videos in the name of social cause. Lakhs of women might end up paying price for your stupidity. It surprises me to see how one can be so foolish to not foresee the consequences of this video. Madhuri Dixit's video on Domestic Violence was also another misleading video; all throughout the video it seemed to address the Gender Policing issue; of how boys and girls are bought up in a different manner; and at the end they show a guy torturing his wife. I have now started to question the intelligence of Vogue for creating such videos.

Currently, Women of our society have bigger problems of Domestic violence, Rape/Incest, Child Abuse, Female Infanticide, Prostitution/Human Trafficking , Sexual Abuse/Harassment, Right to Education, Dowry, Gender Policing and so on. We definitely don't have the privilege to provoke the already men dominated society against freedom for women. If we allow people like Deepika Padukone to be the representative of women in the society then I am afraid how can we really achieve actual freedom for women.

This video is like proving to the so-called male dominated society that women don't really understand the meaning of Freedom; and will always need a man to show them the right direction. One of the videos created in response to Deepika's video, is a good response that clearly shows the flaws in the so called "Female Version". Unfortunately for us women, this clearly shows that Vogue's version was dumb.

Women like Deepika Padukone, Madhuri Dixit etc... you should understand that you represent the elite class of women; Women who are educated, who can think, who are successful, who are looked up to by lakhs and crores of people. You should know the value of the power you carry and the care with which it should be exercised. You cannot just walk into the social media claiming a social cause and throw pranks like these videos.

I believe in freedom for women; but I am not a Feminist. And I am definitely not a fool to fall for videos like these.

Yes, It’s your Life, your Body, your Mind and your Choice. But not all of your choices are correct for the entire society. So please don't try to make choices for my life!

- Sarita

Dated - 5th April 2015

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