My Zero maintenance relations! Thank you guys for being best ones ever!

Over time I have come to realize not all relations stand the test of time. Not all friends no matter how dear they were to you at some point, will stay that way forever. Not all can accept you the way you are with your shortcomings and still love you the same. As in, not all relations evolve to be with zero expectations and non judgmental. Just take a look at your social website - Facebook or Insta or whatever else that you use; see how many folks are listed out there. Thousands of people you have met throughout the years, with whom you have spent some great time, but today are just no better than strangers.

My immediate family, my parents and my sister, who needless to say come with just one major expectation of me being happy their way; other than that - they love me unconditionally; for who I am. Other than them, it’s hard to believe that I still have a handful of friends who I can say will stay with me for years to come. Some of whom I know for 14 years now and some for just 4 years.

And the main reason they have that special place in my heart is because they are true and are zero maintenance. I don’t need to call them every weekend. I don’t need to apologize for forgetting their birthdays or anniversaries. I don’t need to provide justification for what I did or did not do; for what I said and did not mean etc.. etc.. They are all long distance relations. They are all busy with their life as I am with mine. But when we text or call sometimes after almost 5-6 months, there are no complaints. We are just happy to hear each other’s voice, we just start talking like we used to years before, it’s just so refreshing.

I remember envying my friends for having childhood friends like since grade 1 and I dint have anyone like that. I would wonder if only I had one such friend, other than my sister. It’s so wonderful to have such friends who have seen you at your worst, other than your family, who are there for you just a call away. Some of whom I haven’t met since years now, but I can feel that they are also eagerly waiting for that day when we meet again just like I am.

Their views don’t match with mine. They don’t approve of everything I do. But they know I don’t need their approval either. They know me for who I am and they just love me for that. We respect each other a lot, and we know that when it really matters, we will be there for one another.

To know if your friends are real, just wait out on them. Time will do it’s magic and filter out the ones who are meant for you and ones who aren’t. Doesn’t mean they weren’t your true friends or don’t have your best interests in heart. Some just faded in time, whom you never felt like reaching out - neither in happiness nor in distress; so they really don't matter to you anymore. And some, just had expectations that maybe you as a person couldn’t fulfill. Those are the ones I call high maintenance relations. I would like such people to phase out rather than breed bitterness in heart. Not that I don’t want to put in the effort to keep them, but the grounds on which they are kept should not be based on frequent apologies for who you are.

For instance, I don’t call or text people frequently. That’s who I am. Not that I don’t remember them or love them enough; I just don’t do it. And my zero maintenance friends, have figured that out about me and have no issues with it. It’s no longer about anyone’s ego. It’s no longer a question of commitment. It’s no longer about priorities or value of the relation. It’s just another shortcoming of me, that they know and accept. There’s no longer any fear of losing one another. It’s just a simple equation where a smile pops on both the faces on hearing or seeing each other - doesn't matter who called first.

They don’t cringe taking the first step to text or call me after 6 months, and neither do I; just asking “hey what’s up?” It’s amazing to have such easy friends and I just realized I haven’t thanked them lately.

So yeah, my darlings - Deepu, Smi, Sabi, Hooda, Chiru, Sudz, Nammi, Karthik, Tiwari, Deen, Dacchu and 4 year old angel Chittu- I love you guys! I love you for being with me forever! I love you for putting up with my wonderfulness as well as craziness. I love you for just letting me be me. I love you for treating me like an angel at times and as a Satan at other. I love you for being non judgmental. I love you guys for loving me. I love you for being around the corner always. I love you for always putting a smile on my face.

I believe in living life unapologetically, so obviously my best friends are picked wisely. And like they say it's hard to train a new best friend, so I plan on keeping you guys around forever :)

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When Silence Speaks...

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