Beautiful Moment of Togetherness

Beautiful Moment of Togetherness - NEVER AGAIN…

There are times when we think of someone and wish that they were with us at that moment. When we close our eyes and hope that the wait isn't too long; and patiently or impatiently wait for that time to pass. And the moment we meet that person it’s like living all those long tortured moments (which could be yearlong at times) in that few precious seconds of the meeting. All of us have felt it at some point or the other in our lives. But what would we do when we remember someone and know that we can never have that beautiful moment of togetherness again?

I am not speaking of those characters whose role in your life have ended; but are still continuing their performance in some different stage. I do have few people in my life with whom the ties are either broken or just too strained to be normal. But they are there somewhere in this world living their lives. So although the probability of us being together is close to NEVER, it’s not IMPOSSIBLE. May be few years down the line our roads may cross again. We might be changed persons at that time and be glad to see each other or we might still continue the awkwardness and behave like strangers. So like I said the probability of us being together is QUITE POSSIBLE although NOT CERTAIN; but whether it would be a happy or awkward meeting would be TOTALLY UNCERTAIN; since it does not solely depend on you, it equally depends on the other person too. So yeah, if you put in an effort to set up a meeting with those old lost contacts, you might stand a chance of at least seeing them.

But if you noticed my question was actually; what would we do when we remember someone and know that we can NEVER have that beautiful moment of togetherness AGAIN. Yes, I am talking of someone whom you know that your chances of meeting are humanly IMPOSSIBLE; because that someone is no longer alive. So no matter what effort you put in, no matter how many plans you make or change, you will never be able to arrange for that moment of togetherness. What would you do then?

All say that Time is a healer; it will help you forget that person. But you never will forget that person; will you? May be the number of times their thought comes to us gradually reduces. But even if we end up in remembering that person once a week instead of everyday; the amount of torture of those few seconds of remembrance is UNDEFINABLE. How would you share all those feelings or thoughts with that person; that you could never tell him or her? How would you feel when every time you mention of that person in present tense in any conversation; you have to take a brief pause and refer to him or her in past tense? How would you bear the thought that you can never see or hug that person ever; no matter how much badly you tried? You would look up to the sky and wish that all those bedtime stories of angels are really true. And that they would take just this one message of yours; that you miss him or her; that your life is and will never be the same without him. No matter how hard you try not to let those tears from forming in your eyes, they just flow as if they never had stopped. The pain, the torture of the very thought, that you will never see that person again; that you can never hug him or talk to him, and all that is left with you are his memories; is gut wrenching.

It will be one year this August since I lost my Dad to an accident; but it’s like just yesterday that I wished him good night over the call. I still remember, when I got to know that he is no more, I just kept thinking how will my life be without him; and I couldn't imagine anything; I was blank. But today; I know how it is like living without him and I can predict how the rest of my life would be. It will definitely not be the same. Missing him has become my habit. I haven’t stopped living, and I will continue to live the dreams he had for me; but my world isn't the same and it will never be.

So what can you do; when you remember someone and know that you can NEVER have that beautiful moment of togetherness AGAIN? Those who know what this is like can never express it and those who have never been there will never know it.

-Sarita

(19th April 2014)

Comments

Ahamasmi Yodha - My First Tattoo

I finally did it. It isn’t a great achievement to show off, but for me it’s one more item on my bucket list getting fulfilled. So I am very happy about it. What did I do? Oh like I said nothing great – I just got my FIRST Tattoo :) My first Tattoo Artist I had done a lot of research on it since last couple of months. I wanted to get it done on my birthday, but it somehow dint work out. For all the first timers, I wanted to list out my personal experience, just in case it helps :) First of all, I felt it will be very helpful if you have some friends who would have got it done already. But I dint have that privilege. So I went through lot of blogs and articles in About.com, Wikihow, YahooAnswers etc… Well Google, the new lord of knowledge :) has all that you need to know. So, in summary, what I got from all these sites were First decide on what you want to get tattooed and where. Go over it again and again, since it is permanent, you will have to live ...

Dear Dost

Dear Dost, I know you are dealing with a lot in life. A lot has happened in the past that has changed you. A lot is happening right now, that is forcing you to change. A lot of decisions you have to make that's exploding your brains. You are multi tasking like some superhero. You have issues at home, in the family, in your personal life, that you are juggling with. You have professional problems that you are dealing with. A lot - that's what's happening to you right now. When I met you, I saw "a lot" has changed in you. I have changed too, and so have you. But what I could not ask you was - are you still you? I remembered Gulzar's words, written back in 1995 (atleast that's what the source says, I had listened to Jagjit Singh singing this, and it had registered in me since then). din kuchh aise guzārtā hai koī jaise ehsāñ utārtā hai koī dil meñ kuchh yuuñ sambhāltā huuñ ġham jaise zevar sambhāltā hai koī aaina ...

Celebrating the Bridge for Friends!

Just like any other bridge, this one plays a role of connecting you and me. Some are brand new, very inviting, clean and pure, presenting to be strong, yet to get exposed to the harsh reality of life. Some have weathered in many seasons, with few bars of railings missing, few broken planks, yet they stand strong, like huge metal bridges. Some are reinforced with fresh materials every few years, so we stay connected strong and safe for entire lifetime. Some are beyond repair, standing there rusty and broken. Not because it's impossible to fix the gap, but just waiting for equal support from the other side to mend it. Some were meant to serve one another just once. The need to cross that bridge never arose again, doesn't mean we don't remember how important that bridge was in our journey. To new and old, deep and shallow, strong and weak, connected and broken friendships, I am grateful to have known you one way or another. Happy Friendships Day! 🍻

Alaska Diaries - Innocence is Fearless

Innocence is fearless. Innocence is free from consciousness of how it gets perceived. Innocence just acts, reacts at free will. On the Denali National park bus, there was a 6 year old boy, Matt. While driving in the park, there were couple of folks riding the bike, and the guide made a comment " We call them Meals on the Wheels! " ; we all giggled, smiled for 2 secs ; like we did on most of his jokes; and got back to the normal serious self. After almost a minute or two, this kid started laughing out loud. And he told his mom " Oh.. Now I got the joke. Oh that's so Funny. Hahaha.. Meals on the Wheels!! " and he was laughing his heart out. He was the only one in the bus laughing but that dint stop him from doing so. For a full 8-10 mins, he went on and on , reminding himself of that phrase and laughing. I laughed for 4-5 mins with him just because of the way of his laughter; I couldn't control. This happened in the morning; but now on the way...

Home is a house without loved ones!

Home is a house without loved ones! It was September 24th 2005 when I left my home and since then till now I have been to home like some far away relative staying out of town, visiting our family once or twice in a year during diwali or New Year or some ones wedding. A guest in my own home! I joined this software industry on 26th September 2005 in Mysore, then I travelled to Pune in 2006 for a year and then to Bangalore in 2007 for one more year and then to London in 2008 for roughly a year and now in USA-2009. In all these 4 years, I have been busy. Busy getting adjusted to life outside home, for the one who has never stayed out of home, in even a hostel before – to handle this freedom yes definitely thrilling J, seeing new places, making new friends, keeping in touch with old ones. Professional career, half yearly appraisal fights, CRRs, freaking and idiotic managers, some stupid colleagues, some shrewd ones, and some of your own frequency. All this while, I did not really miss my ho...

My Favorite Read - 6 - The Climb by Anatoli Boukreev (and Into Thin Air by Jon Krakauer)

So, now that I want to get into some serious mountaineering activities, I started with reading books on mountains. When you check for top few books on mountains the one that comes up is " Into Thin Air by Jon Krakauer " followed by “ The Climb by Anatoli Boukreev" ; both based on the 1996 Everest disaster which was made quite controversial. I started with "Into Thin Air' and while I was reading, I was continuously in conflict with Jon's views. Mind you, my memory is pretty weak when it comes to remembering details of any story - whether its books or movies. I had watched few documentaries and the Everest movie based on this topic; but that was a while ago. when I started reading this book 2 weeks back, I had no background; you can say I was totally new to this story. And yet, it was difficult for me to understand some of Jon's accusations or feelings. But nevertheless, Jon's style of writing was amazing; he knew how to keep reader's...

Love, Loss and Father's Day

I have been meaning to write this post for a while now, but somehow words fail me. I started writing, and stopped at the first two sentences, erasing and rephrasing, re-iterating the process every time I attempted to write this. 8 months later, today on Father’s day, I think I finally am able to put words into meaningful sentences. It’s weird how most of the times, I just need an inspiration, an idea or a feeling to write pages together without any effort; and then there are times, when my mind is cluttered with so many thoughts ,eager to be put on paper that I find it hard to form a single straight sentence. But I feel like writing today, so here it goes. My best friend lost her mom to a health incident few months back. When I spoke to her she asked me how did I handle it when my dad passed away few years back. I could not explain it to her then, I just said you will learn to live through it. That was when I first tried to write this blog. Even after so many years, ...

SriLanka Backpacking Itinerary - 14 days - One Country - Many Experiences

Finally, I tried to put together the itinerary of the 14 days backpacking trip in SriLanka I did with a friend in December 2019. Some general notes - For accommodation, we used Hostelworld.com ; Booking.com ; Airbnb.ca On an average $7 - $15 USD we get good accommodation in hostel/airbnb. Coconut water - 80 LKR (because I drank a lot of it :)) TukTuk - always suggest you check with locals on what's the average price, so you can negotiate with the drivers better. Bus & train - most preferred mode of transportation, cheap, depending on the time of the day there are chance of it being crowded, but hey - if you want to get the sense of the place and people, go for it. In the expenses I have not included accommodation or food or rides within city. Used Splitwise app to track my daily expenses. Carry USD in cash. local banks do give good exchange rate if you don't convert everything in Colombo airport. People bank of China did not charge ...

बेज़ुबान परछाई..

अपनी परछाई से पूछते रहे हम आखिर कब खो दिया हमने खुद को तुम तो साथ ही चलते हो हमेशा फिर क्यों इत्तला नहीं किया हमे दुनिया से मुतास्सिर हुए है इतने कि बेरंग सी हो गयी है ज़िन्दगी लोगों की झूठी उम्मीदों पे खरा उतरते उतरते खुद से ही दूर होते चले गए हम अगर ये ज़िन्दगी मेरी है और ये मौत भी तो भला क्यों मैं मर मर के जियूं दुनिया कि तसल्ली के लिए क्यूँ उस राह पे चलूँ जहाँ परछाई भी मेरा साथ छोड़ दे ना होते तुम बेज़ुबान इस कदर तो शायद ना होते हम गुमराह इस क़दर मेरे परछाई चलो फिर से साथ मेरे मेरी आवाज़ बनकर, मेरी पेहचान बनकर || -सरिता Dated - 8th July 2015

World of Truths!

I have had different encounters in life, learnt different lessons, seen different people, dealt with different situations. I remember those days when I used to converse with my dad on how things and people were back in his days, and it has gradually changed with time. Changes are inevitable correct? People adapt with time, things change, time travels and world revolves around it. So it's all good. Change is good. But few instances in recent past has made me wonder, how much of all these changes have impacted human values. Basic values like Truth and Honesty. Those were the days when a man gives his word, he sticks to it till his last breath. There were no stamp paper, no documents to hold him accountable to what he says. It was just the words that were told by him and heard by the listener. And today, truth is changing its color every second. Chanakya says " A person should not be too honest. Straight trees are cut first and honest people are screwed first ." ...

When Silence Speaks...

Search This Blog