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Who is your Confidant?

How does living become so difficult and death so easy? 

Is our so called society incapable of an emotional support system to save a single life? 

I can understand, at times given the situation, it's hard for a lot of people to handle things alone. It's for these times specifically that we surround ourselves with friends and families. I find it hard to believe that a person doesn't have a single confidant in his life, if not hundreds, to support him or her during these times. Is our society truly that shallow? The concept of shrinks is next level, to get professional help. But the first step always starts with someone close to you.

Are we truly so insensitive, that we have become unapproachable, and we don't even know it? I think it's time you asked your friends, family or people whom you regard close to you, that do they trust you enough, to share something deep and dark that might mess their life? And it's okay if you are not their go to person, as long as they are able to tell you atleast one name, as long as they have someone, to share their depression or anxiety or whatever emotion that eventually drives one to attempt suicide.

We talk about all these national and international disasters of humanity, of Black lives, of Muslim lives, of elephants, of wildlife, of Iraq, of Palestine etc...etc... Do we take time to ask the person next to us, how his or her life is going? We just assume that everything is fine with the person, and if there's something wrong we will know. 

But what we fail at seeing is how great an actor we all are. We are amazingly talented in hiding our true feelings. The truth is YOU WONT KNOW. You won't know if your spouse, siblings, parents, children, friends are going through something dark until you don't confront them. And in the same way, until you don't speak about it, no one else will know what you are going through. It's a myth that people who love you can sense if something's wrong. The truth is even if they sense it, your instinct of being normal, stops them from knowing anything substantial. 

It's very very disturbing for me to hear of people taking their own life. I can't begin to comprehend the desolation they might have felt. Someone told me that it's usually that one moment where they get all that courage to attempt suicide. It's the burst of either rage or sadness or contempt that just pushes them over the edge. But if only we could communicate better, maybe, just maybe a few innocent messed up lives could be saved.

We are living in a world filled with tools for communication. But we as humans have forgotten how to communicate what truly matters. We don't make the best use of these tools.  

I don't think anyone, any life, can be so messed up that they can't be saved. For me the only important resource on this planet, in this universe is, my life. If I have my life, I can figure the rest of it. I love myself, my life with utmost passion. And so, seeing people throw away something so precious, always unsettles me.

It's not about how troubled you think they are, or if their problems are real or not, it's not about being judgemental, it's about being there for them, just listening to them, and telling that things will be alright.

See if you have that one confidant in your life, so when a storm hits you hard and you need someone to clean the debris, you have that person on speed dial. I don't think humans are incapable of empathy. So, if someone thinks that they can come to you, be there for them, unbiased. They don't need a judge at that time, there's thousands of them already doing that job.

I think we are all just caught up in a maze, thinking we won't be the one needing that kind of help, just like we think we won't die tomorrow. It's ignorance of the darker sides of life, that leaves a lot of us unprepared. And the society we live in, is very judgemental including ourselves. So it's very hard, when you start thinking, who can really see your naked soul? Who can help you when you need it? 

Ask these questions if you haven't already. And try finding your true confidant or confidante in the sea of so called true relations you swim in; and find yourself lucky if someone thinks of you as theirs.

(Woke up to a suicide news, and hence all the blabbering. Had to get it out of my system, so I could get on with my life.)


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