Price Tag

“Was it worth it?” she asked taking her headphones off, as she saw him flip the newspaper page.

“Hmm. Depends on what price tag you put on it.” he said straightening his reading glasses without looking up.

"Well, you know what I mean." she said slightly irritated.

"It's all perspective pumpkin, it's all perspective.” He said continuing to read the economics section of the paper.

“Meaning?” she asked still keeping her gaze fixed at him.

He took a deep breath looking at her and said "Never look at these things in pieces sweetheart. Take ten steps back and look at the broader picture - a little bit of past, the whole of present and a lot of future. Then you will truly be able to say if you paid for something or if you invested in something." winking at her he continued in a taunting tone "You know what I mean"

"Hmm. You won't give away that easily right." She said shaking her head and said "Anyway, How do you feel now that it's over?"

"Over? Why do you think it's an end? I feel this is just the beginning." he said turning the page.

"Pop-Pop, enough of this theatrical replies. I have always stood by you no matter what. But, what you are doing here is not right pop-pop" she said with frustration, keeping her headphones aside, and straightening herself on the sofa.

"But why are you overthinking this? What are you so worried about?" He asked looking at her inquisitively.

"It's just... things are unraveling so fast. And I am not liking the direction in which it's going" she said looking slightly uncomfortable.

"Alright. Come here. Tell me what's this really about." He asked folding his paper, placing it over the coffee table and leaning forward on his rocking chair.

His silver white hair neatly partitioned on one side. Every wrinkle on his face had some story, some experience to share. He was in his late sixties, but he looked no older than early fifties. His serene and calm face with that soothing smile had a huge contribution in him looking younger than his age. Having served in military in his early twenties, and having seen things one probably shouldn’t at that age, he had learnt soon enough how precious life was.

Harper was just 15 years old, and growing up she spent a lot of her time with her grandpa, whom she lovingly called pop-pop. She learnt a great deal from him. Her pop-pop was her role model, she adored him more than her parents. At times that worried him, but he was glad that he was able to spend time with her while he could, the time he couldn’t spend with his daughter while she was Harper's age. Harper was his way of reliving himself as both a father and grandfather.

"I don't know pop-pop. I feel you should not be giving up on her. Not on our account." She said with a sulking face.

"Oh... Why do you think I am giving up? And what's all this about “our account” thing?" He said air quoting with a soft affectionate look on his face.

"You know what I mean Pop-Pop. You should be with her." Harper said lifting her eyes slowly and looking at him reluctantly.

He smiled. And she felt at ease immediately. His smile had that power on her. No matter how disturbed she would be, when she saw him smile, all her worries would melt away.

“Listen sweetheart.” He said “With love, no matter at what age it happens, whether it's the first or the tenth, it can never be forced. And it can never be thrown away for wrong reasons. It might seem too soon for you to truly understand but with time you will realize it."

"So you won't miss her?" She asked with a confused look.

"It's not like we broke up. She needs time, to take care of this with her family. And I need to give time to your mom, to be fine with our relationship. And I know, that time is one thing I don't have much left with me, but that doesn’t mean we rush into things and add more to the list of regrets. Regrets..”

He sighed, leaned back on his chair and slightly rocking continued “Regrets - something you will understand more as you grow older, just like love, the true meaning of which we understand only with experience, experience that comes from all those choices we made along the way.”

Then returning his attention to his sweet pumpkin he said “So to answer your question, no I won't miss her, because she will still be around, like before. Nothing’s changing between us.”

"And it's okay if you don't get to marry her this winter like you wished?” She walked over to him and sat on the wooden floor at his foot looking up at him.

"Hahaha,” he burst out into his signature laughter, that usually had a tendency to light up any gathering he would be in. “With time honey, you will understand more about marriage too. But for now, just know, that it's okay, not to have a name for a relationship, and still be loved the same. Sometimes there are emotions that don’t want to be bound in any relation. That don’t make them any less important or pure.” He said brushing her hair off her forehead.

He looked at her and continued, “I am not talking you out of any commitments dear. All I am saying is do things, because you want to, not because you have to. I don’t HAVE TO marry Elle. We both had decided, that we will give our families time to accept us, and then if we feel like it, we will marry, if not, we will continue living as we do today and maybe just go on that backpacking world trip we've been raving about.”

They both laughed. She placed her head on his lap and said “I like her Pop-pop. She is fun. And most importantly, she keeps you happy.”

“That she does” he said in a low voice stroking her head.

"I wasn't around much when your mom was growing up, so there are a lot of things I could not tell your mom. And well, I wasn’t quite wise back then to give her any advice anyway.” He said waving his hand in the air.

“But now that I have more time to spend with you, my angel, let me tell you something. Make your own mistakes sweetheart. Don't be scared to explore. Above all, love like there's no tomorrow. Don't make it too complicated. With time you will learn from your own experiences, what’s best for you. But one thing you must never forget, is to dream. There's always a better tomorrow if you dare to dream it. Never stop dreaming. Never stop questioning. And never ever stop falling in love, no matter how many times you get your heart broken.”

He bent and kissed her head. And both of them captured this exact moment in their head, for they both knew that with passing time, these moments were going to be more rare than before, and they wanted to grab any such precious moments while it lasted.

Comments

Zindagi Gulzar Hai - A feast to ones eyes!

Today I am here to make a much interesting comparison of our current Indian TV industry with our neighboring country’s television industry. Interesting because I never thought I would ever engage in watching any of the Pakistan TV series/movies or listening to their music. My disinterest in Pakistan entertainment was not because of the tensed relationship with the country. But I myself am not a big fan of TV serials. The kind of drama that is filled in Indian TV Channels today is just exhausting and tiring to watch. I hardly follow any Indian TV series. When I visit home on vacation, I join my family in watching the program they watch and that’s how I keep myself updated with what is trending in the TV industry. I love listening to music and I listen to all genres of music. I did start listening to Pakistani music since last few years and have admired their music. Strings, Fuzon, Kaavish, Jal, Rahat Fateh Ali Khan, Ghulam Ali, Parveen Abida, Quratulain Baloch and many ...

My Favorite Read - 6 - The Climb by Anatoli Boukreev (and Into Thin Air by Jon Krakauer)

So, now that I want to get into some serious mountaineering activities, I started with reading books on mountains. When you check for top few books on mountains the one that comes up is " Into Thin Air by Jon Krakauer " followed by “ The Climb by Anatoli Boukreev" ; both based on the 1996 Everest disaster which was made quite controversial. I started with "Into Thin Air' and while I was reading, I was continuously in conflict with Jon's views. Mind you, my memory is pretty weak when it comes to remembering details of any story - whether its books or movies. I had watched few documentaries and the Everest movie based on this topic; but that was a while ago. when I started reading this book 2 weeks back, I had no background; you can say I was totally new to this story. And yet, it was difficult for me to understand some of Jon's accusations or feelings. But nevertheless, Jon's style of writing was amazing; he knew how to keep reader's...

Ahamasmi Yodha - My First Tattoo

I finally did it. It isn’t a great achievement to show off, but for me it’s one more item on my bucket list getting fulfilled. So I am very happy about it. What did I do? Oh like I said nothing great – I just got my FIRST Tattoo :) My first Tattoo Artist I had done a lot of research on it since last couple of months. I wanted to get it done on my birthday, but it somehow dint work out. For all the first timers, I wanted to list out my personal experience, just in case it helps :) First of all, I felt it will be very helpful if you have some friends who would have got it done already. But I dint have that privilege. So I went through lot of blogs and articles in About.com, Wikihow, YahooAnswers etc… Well Google, the new lord of knowledge :) has all that you need to know. So, in summary, what I got from all these sites were First decide on what you want to get tattooed and where. Go over it again and again, since it is permanent, you will have to live ...

Uncovered, Not Exposed

After ages of procrastination, I finally decided to try formal art classes. I had always feared that rules would take the fun out of my art. Art is where I go to unwind and let my mind wander, and the idea of placing boundaries in that safe space never sat well with me. But this year, I signed up for weekend spring classes; telling myself to keep an open mind and take in only what resonated. I was intimidated - I didn't know if this would draw me deeper into art or push me away. To my surprise, it was overwhelming, but in the best possible way. The reason for this post is however not to cover my art journey ( I have just started so I will give it some time to settle in ); but instead to capture my thoughts upon observing a profession in real life that I have only watched on screen - Live nude models. And the quiet power of their bare form. I spent an entire day observing nude male and female body for figure drawing, and it blew my mind in ways I had not expected. ...

Life... A Blank Page!

Whenever I open a notebook and come across the set of blank pages; my mind goes blank. For some reason, it always reminds me of my life. It forces me to start thinking about my life; about the past and the future. Being part of the age of computers and belonging to the IT industry, I hardly get an opportunity to actually pick a pen and write in the notebook. I write lot of blogs, poems etc… but I write them on the webpage or in Microsoft word in my laptop. Once in a while I like to go back to traditional form of writing; using the actual pen and paper. And in last few years; I noticed that every time I try doing that for some reason the blank paper gets me all philosophical. Although I never have that thought while opening the book; but whenever I see those blank pages; I just go blank. I always feel that my life is staring back at me with all those unanswered silenced questions, doubts, thoughts…forcing me to think – What does my lif...

Celebrating the Bridge for Friends!

Just like any other bridge, this one plays a role of connecting you and me. Some are brand new, very inviting, clean and pure, presenting to be strong, yet to get exposed to the harsh reality of life. Some have weathered in many seasons, with few bars of railings missing, few broken planks, yet they stand strong, like huge metal bridges. Some are reinforced with fresh materials every few years, so we stay connected strong and safe for entire lifetime. Some are beyond repair, standing there rusty and broken. Not because it's impossible to fix the gap, but just waiting for equal support from the other side to mend it. Some were meant to serve one another just once. The need to cross that bridge never arose again, doesn't mean we don't remember how important that bridge was in our journey. To new and old, deep and shallow, strong and weak, connected and broken friendships, I am grateful to have known you one way or another. Happy Friendships Day! 🍻

My Favorite Read - 7 - Call Me by Your Name by André Aciman

"Call me by your name and I will call you by mine" . Yes. ' Let me think of the right words .' is what I kept telling myself for last one month, trying to put off writing this review, but I think it's time. I already bought a hardcopy of this book to add to my personal library. Yes, that's how much I loved it. This was the first audiobook I listened to when I started with Audible in May this year. I wanted to try some simple book to see if I would even enjoy Audible (considering I am a huge fan of books I can hold vs digital) and this book had good review for narration. So boom, I downloaded it and am glad I did. I don't know if it's the story itself or Armie Hammer's voice or the combination of both that made this love story so enticing. I don't read much of romantic novels, so I am not sure what other good novels or writers are out there in this genre. But Aciman definitely has my heart for "Call me by your name." ...

Share the Smile!

We don’t readily share our happiness with faraway friends. Atleast I don’t share my happy smiling face every now and then except with my sister. I just feel maybe the person may not be in a good mood; might be going through a rough phase or what would they care anyway, so why bother. But I realized today that it might brighten up someone’s day unexpectedly too. So am sitting here in the airport. Had woke up at 3 in the morning, did the drill of getting ready, packing up, checking out of hotel, Uber, traffic, security queue, reach the gate and find out that flight is delayed by 2 hours. And I wasn’t really mad or in bad mood; I have got used to all this; so now I really don’t get worked up at all when am stuck in traffic or delayed flights. Simple mantra - it is what it is, you can do much, so chill. But having said that, I am definitely groggy and sleepy; and have no reason to be smiling. I was just reading a book; and analyzing all the folks at the gate. Just kind of lost you can s...

My Brightest Star

You were very different from the others. The way you spoke about stars and universe, it was like you were part of them. I never understood your language, but I always enjoyed listening to you. It was so romantic when you spoke with such passion about universe. That friend of yours, Hubble, the way you discussed it's findings with so much excitement, I used to fall in love with you over and over again. The way you waited like a child outside the tent in freezing nights, to get the glimpse of milkyway, would always make me hug and kiss you. The nebulae, constellations, meteor showers, comets and so many such words, that I never knew before I met you; I started learning about them from you. For me everything was just a twinkling star in the dark night sky. You introduced me to them with names, like they were your friends, like they all were talking to you, like they all had some purpose. I thought you were crazy, but then I understood why you were so crazy about them. I still s...

खूबसूरत ग़ज़ल

महफ़िल वो सजी थी शाम ए ग़ज़ल की बैठा वहाँ था मैं बस चंद कदम दूर उस से | सजी थी खुद वो एक खूबसूरत ग़ज़ल की तरह अकेली जगमगा रही थी वो किसी जुगनू की तरह | शायरों का हर वो लब्ज़ जो गूंज रही थी वहां, मैं पढता गया उन्हें उसके दिलकश चेहरे पर, जैसे हर ग़ज़ल की रूह उसमें बसी थी | कभी वो ओझल सी उसकी आंखें, जिनके किनारे आ रूकती एक छोटी सी बूँद, बयान करती, की वो दर्द महसूस किया है उसने भी | कभी वो हलकी सी उसकी मुस्कान, होंठों के किनारे आ रूकती, इशारा करती, की वो हसीं पल जिया है उसने भी | ना जाने कौन थी वो | पर हर ग़ज़ल के हर एक जस्बात की गेहराई, उसकी आंखो में झलक रही थी उस रात | आज भी दिल याद करता है उस शाम को, जैसे अल्फ़ाज़ों को मिल गया था एक हसीं चेहरा, जो आज भी दे जाती है एक अजीब सी सुकून इस दिल को । सरीता 6th Feb 2020.

When Silence Speaks...

Search This Blog