“Was it worth it?” she asked taking her headphones off, as she saw him flip the newspaper page.
“Hmm. Depends on what price tag you put on it.” he said straightening his reading glasses without looking up.
"Well, you know what I mean." she said slightly irritated.
"It's all perspective pumpkin, it's all perspective.” He said continuing to read the economics section of the paper.
“Meaning?” she asked still keeping her gaze fixed at him.
He took a deep breath looking at her and said "Never look at these things in pieces sweetheart. Take ten steps back and look at the broader picture - a little bit of past, the whole of present and a lot of future. Then you will truly be able to say if you paid for something or if you invested in something." winking at her he continued in a taunting tone "You know what I mean"
"Hmm. You won't give away that easily right." She said shaking her head and said "Anyway, How do you feel now that it's over?"
"Over? Why do you think it's an end? I feel this is just the beginning." he said turning the page.
"Pop-Pop, enough of this theatrical replies. I have always stood by you no matter what. But, what you are doing here is not right pop-pop" she said with frustration, keeping her headphones aside, and straightening herself on the sofa.
"But why are you overthinking this? What are you so worried about?" He asked looking at her inquisitively.
"It's just... things are unraveling so fast. And I am not liking the direction in which it's going" she said looking slightly uncomfortable.
"Alright. Come here. Tell me what's this really about." He asked folding his paper, placing it over the coffee table and leaning forward on his rocking chair.
His silver white hair neatly partitioned on one side. Every wrinkle on his face had some story, some experience to share. He was in his late sixties, but he looked no older than early fifties. His serene and calm face with that soothing smile had a huge contribution in him looking younger than his age. Having served in military in his early twenties, and having seen things one probably shouldn’t at that age, he had learnt soon enough how precious life was.
Harper was just 15 years old, and growing up she spent a lot of her time with her grandpa, whom she lovingly called pop-pop. She learnt a great deal from him. Her pop-pop was her role model, she adored him more than her parents. At times that worried him, but he was glad that he was able to spend time with her while he could, the time he couldn’t spend with his daughter while she was Harper's age. Harper was his way of reliving himself as both a father and grandfather.
"I don't know pop-pop. I feel you should not be giving up on her. Not on our account." She said with a sulking face.
"Oh... Why do you think I am giving up? And what's all this about “our account” thing?" He said air quoting with a soft affectionate look on his face.
"You know what I mean Pop-Pop. You should be with her." Harper said lifting her eyes slowly and looking at him reluctantly.
He smiled. And she felt at ease immediately. His smile had that power on her. No matter how disturbed she would be, when she saw him smile, all her worries would melt away.
“Listen sweetheart.” He said “With love, no matter at what age it happens, whether it's the first or the tenth, it can never be forced. And it can never be thrown away for wrong reasons. It might seem too soon for you to truly understand but with time you will realize it."
"So you won't miss her?" She asked with a confused look.
"It's not like we broke up. She needs time, to take care of this with her family. And I need to give time to your mom, to be fine with our relationship. And I know, that time is one thing I don't have much left with me, but that doesn’t mean we rush into things and add more to the list of regrets. Regrets..”
He sighed, leaned back on his chair and slightly rocking continued “Regrets - something you will understand more as you grow older, just like love, the true meaning of which we understand only with experience, experience that comes from all those choices we made along the way.”
Then returning his attention to his sweet pumpkin he said “So to answer your question, no I won't miss her, because she will still be around, like before. Nothing’s changing between us.”
"And it's okay if you don't get to marry her this winter like you wished?” She walked over to him and sat on the wooden floor at his foot looking up at him.
"Hahaha,” he burst out into his signature laughter, that usually had a tendency to light up any gathering he would be in. “With time honey, you will understand more about marriage too. But for now, just know, that it's okay, not to have a name for a relationship, and still be loved the same. Sometimes there are emotions that don’t want to be bound in any relation. That don’t make them any less important or pure.” He said brushing her hair off her forehead.
He looked at her and continued, “I am not talking you out of any commitments dear. All I am saying is do things, because you want to, not because you have to. I don’t HAVE TO marry Elle. We both had decided, that we will give our families time to accept us, and then if we feel like it, we will marry, if not, we will continue living as we do today and maybe just go on that backpacking world trip we've been raving about.”
They both laughed. She placed her head on his lap and said “I like her Pop-pop. She is fun. And most importantly, she keeps you happy.”
“That she does” he said in a low voice stroking her head.
"I wasn't around much when your mom was growing up, so there are a lot of things I could not tell your mom. And well, I wasn’t quite wise back then to give her any advice anyway.” He said waving his hand in the air.
“But now that I have more time to spend with you, my angel, let me tell you something. Make your own mistakes sweetheart. Don't be scared to explore. Above all, love like there's no tomorrow. Don't make it too complicated. With time you will learn from your own experiences, what’s best for you. But one thing you must never forget, is to dream. There's always a better tomorrow if you dare to dream it. Never stop dreaming. Never stop questioning. And never ever stop falling in love, no matter how many times you get your heart broken.”
He bent and kissed her head. And both of them captured this exact moment in their head, for they both knew that with passing time, these moments were going to be more rare than before, and they wanted to grab any such precious moments while it lasted.
Comments
Post a Comment