The Scent

He took a deep breath in, and could sense a familiar fragrance. He quickly opened his eyes and looked around.

He kept telling himself ‘No, it can’t be.’ And yet his heart was secretly hoping he could catch a glimpse of HER. But the air now smelled of freshly brewed coffee, cupcakes, pastries and a regular morning.

He knew that aqua and wild flower fragrance mixed with a shade of her too well. That unique scent. Was his mind playing tricks on him? Was he imagining things? But why would he? He hadn’t thought of her recently, she wasn’t on his active mind.

Subconsciously? Yes. Yes of course. She had never left him. And he had learnt to live with her memories. It wasn’t painful anymore. So why would he make up stuffs all of a sudden?

No. He wasn’t hallucinating. He definitely smelled that scent a few minutes back.

Tired of craning his neck, he stood up, thrusted his hands in his pockets and started scanning the cafe. He just tried to act like he was looking for a friend.

Friend. Huh. What would they know who she was to him?

But what’s the point of finding out if she’s here? It’s not like he was going to walk up to her and talk? If he met her, what would he say? In fact, what would SHE say? Oh, that would be something, wouldn’t it? He felt his cheeks flush with embarrassment at that thought.

Wow. Worst still. What if she is here with her boyfriend? Or husband? Nah, he would have known if she had either of those. Once in a while he browsed her social media accounts.

No, he wasn’t stalking her. He just wants to stay updated of her current status is all.

His racing heart was now slowing it’s pace, as if switching from running to jogging. He slumped back on his chair, and took a sip of his coffee. Still darting his eyes from one face to another in the cafe, he continued the conversation in his head.

Well, what good was it anyway. He hated that thing called hope. It just pops up without notice and ends up making him miserable. He shook his head and watched out of the window.

If only second chances were that easy. For all he knew, she would deny even recognizing him. And why would she? He deserved it anyway. How he wished at times he could just go back in time and fix it all.

“Aah” he screamed in his head, while letting out a heavy sigh. Why did he still love her so much? At this rate, he would end up being single forever. He had hardly liked anyone after her, and how could he? No one was her. And if they were not her, he didn’t want them. Dating was so overrated. Now you see, why it’s so complicated? He murmured into his coffee mug, as if the caffeine had some secret advice to offer.

Just then a cold hand touched his arm, and a thin voice called out ‘Ishaan?’.

That scent had now filled his soul like Bach’s music. Time or rather the whole universe had slowed down. All background sounds were muffled, and only his heart beat was ringing in his ears, which had already switched from jogging to bolting in lightning speed. When his eyes finally met hers, he was left speechless with his mouth hanging open as if caught in mid conversation.

‘Hey!! It’s really you!’ She exclaimed.

And all he could bring himself to say was “I am sorry for everything Aanya”. They both stared at each other with moist eyes.

Until she said “Me too” and broke the spell.

Comments

Zindagi Gulzar Hai - A feast to ones eyes!

Today I am here to make a much interesting comparison of our current Indian TV industry with our neighboring country’s television industry. Interesting because I never thought I would ever engage in watching any of the Pakistan TV series/movies or listening to their music. My disinterest in Pakistan entertainment was not because of the tensed relationship with the country. But I myself am not a big fan of TV serials. The kind of drama that is filled in Indian TV Channels today is just exhausting and tiring to watch. I hardly follow any Indian TV series. When I visit home on vacation, I join my family in watching the program they watch and that’s how I keep myself updated with what is trending in the TV industry. I love listening to music and I listen to all genres of music. I did start listening to Pakistani music since last few years and have admired their music. Strings, Fuzon, Kaavish, Jal, Rahat Fateh Ali Khan, Ghulam Ali, Parveen Abida, Quratulain Baloch and many ...

Uncovered, Not Exposed

After ages of procrastination, I finally decided to try formal art classes. I had always feared that rules would take the fun out of my art. Art is where I go to unwind and let my mind wander, and the idea of placing boundaries in that safe space never sat well with me. But this year, I signed up for weekend spring classes; telling myself to keep an open mind and take in only what resonated. I was intimidated - I didn't know if this would draw me deeper into art or push me away. To my surprise, it was overwhelming, but in the best possible way. The reason for this post is however not to cover my art journey ( I have just started so I will give it some time to settle in ); but instead to capture my thoughts upon observing a profession in real life that I have only watched on screen - Live nude models. And the quiet power of their bare form. I spent an entire day observing nude male and female body for figure drawing, and it blew my mind in ways I had not expected. ...

My Favorite Read - 6 - The Climb by Anatoli Boukreev (and Into Thin Air by Jon Krakauer)

So, now that I want to get into some serious mountaineering activities, I started with reading books on mountains. When you check for top few books on mountains the one that comes up is " Into Thin Air by Jon Krakauer " followed by “ The Climb by Anatoli Boukreev" ; both based on the 1996 Everest disaster which was made quite controversial. I started with "Into Thin Air' and while I was reading, I was continuously in conflict with Jon's views. Mind you, my memory is pretty weak when it comes to remembering details of any story - whether its books or movies. I had watched few documentaries and the Everest movie based on this topic; but that was a while ago. when I started reading this book 2 weeks back, I had no background; you can say I was totally new to this story. And yet, it was difficult for me to understand some of Jon's accusations or feelings. But nevertheless, Jon's style of writing was amazing; he knew how to keep reader's...

Ahamasmi Yodha - My First Tattoo

I finally did it. It isn’t a great achievement to show off, but for me it’s one more item on my bucket list getting fulfilled. So I am very happy about it. What did I do? Oh like I said nothing great – I just got my FIRST Tattoo :) My first Tattoo Artist I had done a lot of research on it since last couple of months. I wanted to get it done on my birthday, but it somehow dint work out. For all the first timers, I wanted to list out my personal experience, just in case it helps :) First of all, I felt it will be very helpful if you have some friends who would have got it done already. But I dint have that privilege. So I went through lot of blogs and articles in About.com, Wikihow, YahooAnswers etc… Well Google, the new lord of knowledge :) has all that you need to know. So, in summary, what I got from all these sites were First decide on what you want to get tattooed and where. Go over it again and again, since it is permanent, you will have to live ...

Life... A Blank Page!

Whenever I open a notebook and come across the set of blank pages; my mind goes blank. For some reason, it always reminds me of my life. It forces me to start thinking about my life; about the past and the future. Being part of the age of computers and belonging to the IT industry, I hardly get an opportunity to actually pick a pen and write in the notebook. I write lot of blogs, poems etc… but I write them on the webpage or in Microsoft word in my laptop. Once in a while I like to go back to traditional form of writing; using the actual pen and paper. And in last few years; I noticed that every time I try doing that for some reason the blank paper gets me all philosophical. Although I never have that thought while opening the book; but whenever I see those blank pages; I just go blank. I always feel that my life is staring back at me with all those unanswered silenced questions, doubts, thoughts…forcing me to think – What does my lif...

Another Day, Another Night, Another Year.

This year has been interesting. Strange and interesting. Yu's "Go where the wind is" song best describes my mood for 2024. It went by fast yet it felt like an eternity. It was exhausting at times for reasons I don't know. I can't describe it in words. Of course, 2024 had its moments. A new country, a new language, a new fitness goal and many memorable experiences. Some good ones and others unwanted. It's just the general mood of 2024. It's been kind of heavy on my mind, my heart. Not on the negative side, nothing sad or painful. Just ... Anyway, want to just record this monologue somewhere before this year ends, so here goes nothing. Jeff Satur's Dum Dum, Lake of Bays Forest Floor, Machu Picchu shots, Dominos Pizza, Rainy night, The Demon Slayer comic strip, Some scribbles, Random notes, Uke plucking, Wang Yibo's smile, The Double C drama and the Fireworks outside. Just some of the last moments of 2024. Thank you 2024, you have been good to me...

My Favorite Read - 2 - Hum If You Dont Know The Words by Bianca Marais

A novel that unravels details of South Africa from apartheid era. A story telling by two different people coming from opposite backgrounds. A book of emotions so closely knit with the characters that you really cannot resist getting emotionally involved yourself. 'Hum If You Don't Know The Words' I am not sure how many of you are aware of apartheid era, and even if you know all about it, this book shows the experiences from both sides of the players; and that's completely different from what you learn from your history books or wikipedia. For me, this book took me deep into the world of South African society during the 1970s; letting me experience the thoughts and feelings of both a white child and a black mother. Like the book says 'Divided by the colors of their skin, their paths should never have crossed' Somewhere, I don't recall if it was a movie or a book, a person asks why people even bother to study history, why waste time on...

The Year That Quietly Reset My Life.

A lot has happened this year and a lot went unaccomplished. 2025 once again reminded me of how unpredictable life is, how life happens when we are busy making other plans. Life surprises us and life shocks us. There were many good things this year - backpacking entire Central America for a month and half, meeting new people, reconnecting with old school friends, learning Japanese and many other such memorable moments. But earlier this year while training for dragon boat race competition, I was diagnosed with a idiopathic health condition, that threw a wrench in my lifestyle. All those lab tests, scans for a person who rarely saw a doctor for years was stressful. Although it got diagnosed early because of my attention to health stats; not knowing the root cause for the illness nor being able to determine the length of the treatment plan disheartened me. At the time, I kind of understood a non-smoker’s reaction to being diagnosed with cancer; that reaction of “But I never smoked onc...

Arijit Singh - I Bow to You.

It's been a while that I have liked any latest songs. Songs from 80s and ghazals still play when I am in mood for some good music. Not that there hasn't been good music in recent past. But after a long time this song touched my soul. Arijit Singh had made it to my list of favorites long back. But he was still not in that elite league of singers to whom my head bows with respect - Jagjit Singh, Kishore Kumar, Lata Mangeshkar, Mohd. Rafi, Ghulam Ali, Mehdi Hasan, Bhimsen Joshi and M S Subbulaxmi . ( I am not listing the musicians here; just the singers who humble my heart and soul. I have a different list of elite musicians and directors and actors covering Yanni, Kenny G, Pancham Da, Hans Zimmer, Madhubala, K K menon, Aamir Khan and so on; whom I duly respect. But this post is dedicated to singers. ) I had been to Raazi movie last week and heard this song for the first time - Ae watan. I heard it again after that with my headphones on, eyes closed;and I just surrender...

My Brightest Star

You were very different from the others. The way you spoke about stars and universe, it was like you were part of them. I never understood your language, but I always enjoyed listening to you. It was so romantic when you spoke with such passion about universe. That friend of yours, Hubble, the way you discussed it's findings with so much excitement, I used to fall in love with you over and over again. The way you waited like a child outside the tent in freezing nights, to get the glimpse of milkyway, would always make me hug and kiss you. The nebulae, constellations, meteor showers, comets and so many such words, that I never knew before I met you; I started learning about them from you. For me everything was just a twinkling star in the dark night sky. You introduced me to them with names, like they were your friends, like they all were talking to you, like they all had some purpose. I thought you were crazy, but then I understood why you were so crazy about them. I still s...

When Silence Speaks...

Search This Blog